Making Lemonade

So I made an observation today.  I was at McD's, using up the free Wi-Fi, as usual.  I don't have "My-Fi" as of yet, and unless my kids are around, I don't know anything about that syncing thing you do with your cellphone.  Not that it would matter at this point, since I lost my dumb smartphone, and am back to my tried-and-true Razr.  That's right, I pulled it out of the drawer, charged it up, and it works!  Don't you judge me.  I've known my Razr longer than I've known most of you.  Oh, so back to my epiphany.  I was trying to find the best seat...one that wasn't near the door because it's freezing in Chicago today, and preferably one that wasn't within close proximity to anyone who could read over my shoulder.  Paranoid, I know, but I just wasn't in the mood for identity theft today.  I finally picked a table near a window, and there was a guy behind me, but he didn't have a computer so I figured I was safe.  I don't know why that would be.

What I realized was that I pretty much obliterate the computer screen.  I have a smaller laptop (in my defense) and the simple act of putting myself in front of it blocks any and all intruders, snoops and voyeurs.  See, if I was as slim as I thought I wanted to be, I would have been all nervous, leaning into the screen, sitting crooked, trying to put the laptop on my lap---hey, wait a minute...oh never mind.  This extra weight is an unexpected gift.  Who Knew????  Along with the ability to warm myself on a cold day (or an already excruciatingly hot one) with one quick power surge, I also have a built in privacy shield (or force field, as it were).

Just when I thought life was handing me too many lemons!

Go ahead skinny girl!  Put all your business out there!

It Takes Two!  But I still got that password!

Nah-anh!  Not today!  I can eat my streudel, surf and still block you!

Is it just me, or am I just too funny today?  My friend Sherida calls me "The Black Erma Bombeck".  I like it!