Things I Never Wear.

I jokingly put this post on my Facebook page, after I did a "selfie" photo shoot today.  I really hate the fact that I can't wear what I want to wear, and I hate it even more when I see people blogging about fashion, and looking fabulous in it.  I decided to play "dress-up" this morning, then play with the photo software on my computer.  I was fairly pleased.  

I bought this pink coat at Savers, about a year ago for twelve bucks.  It's a Ralph Lauren, and it's plus size.  In fact, it's too big, which seems unlikely, but it really is.  The dress, from Walmart.  I've never worn it, because it's too short and too tight.  In the fashion world, this is called a "bodycon" dress.  Tight, stretchy, not for me. If this is bodycon, then I'm body "self-con".  Still, I sucked it up (literally) and put it on.  I like the pictures, but if I ever went out in this, the coat would never come off. I think I got the shoes at St. Vincent's, for four dollars.  

Next up, shorts.  I do not wear shorts. I inherited this pair from one of my niece's closet purges.  I get a lot of my clothes this way.  I love the fact that she's a shopaholic, she's a fashionista, she's fickle, and she's my size.  Win-Win-Win for me!  The top?  Another Walmart special, that I've had for a year and never worn.  I don't know why, because I do like it a lot.  Same shoes, and the bag is from a really dirty dig that I went to waded through. No pain, no gain.  I gained a ton of shoes, bags and vintage dresses.

Next up?  Jeans!  I own two pairs.  I wear one, and not often.  Lately, I've been seeing my friends rocking the sequins and I am officially jealous.  Hey wait...I have two sequinned tops.  I should wear them. This one is from--I don't even know, but it was an estate sale or thrift store, of that I'm sure.  It fits great, but it's heavy and scratchy, and when you are used to wearing t-shirts and yoga pants, which you know I am, getting dressed up is hard!  The slingback pumps are from St. Vincent's, $4.  

So maybe these will become things I do wear.  Maybe.  Now I just need someplace to go...

The double frame on the pictures is an effect called "thinify".  It doesn't work.  It just squeezes in the borders of the pic, which means everything stays proportionally the same, in relation to everything else.  I guess what I really need is Photoshop.  That's what they use to literally carve chunks out of your body.  I'm not that conscientious, so I won't be doing any curve carving anytime soon.  The belly is what it is.  

You will never hear me say a dirty word.  I hate swearing.  But just this once, I will have to use the "R" word.  Oh I can feel my guts bubbling up at the thought of it.  R, R-r, R-r-r-r...oh I just can't!  Go for it, you say?  Okay, here's goes: RETAIL!  I can't believe that word just came out of my mouth.  Where's that bar of soap?  In all fairness (to me) it's a Really Cheap Retail 

from Ross.  It's a nice, weighty polyester blend that has a soft, cashmere-ish feel, and faux-leather trim.  I just found it on Macy's, even though I bought mine a year ago, for $79. I paid under $30. 

Show some love to the 3R's!

Cooking post tomorrow!