Out of the mouths of Old Folks.

Today, my mom said something I've never heard her say before.  She has tons of sayings that she says "we used to say in the country", but I've never heard anyone else, city or country, say them.  Today's was a doozy.

Mom:  These dogs don't like the food you bought them.

Me:  Sure they do.  If they get hungry enough, they'll eat it.

Mom:  True.  Hard times will make a monkey eat pepper.

Say What????

This one was new to me but I have a list of favorites that I've mentally compiled over the years.

You've heard the saying "they're thicker than thieves"...?  My mom's version is "they're peeing through the same quilt".

"Doesn't have a pot to pee in" becomes "...a pot to pee in OR a window to throw it out of".

"Feeling your Wheaties" (getting a big head) in my mom's world is "got your hips up on your
shoulders".

"Every shut-eye ain't sleep, and every good-bye ain't gone".

"Can't see for lookin'!"

Folks, I get my sense of humor from all sides.  My grandfather on my dad's side had a few zingers of his own.  How about:

"She's so mean, her hair won't grow".

"Ugly folks are so conspicuous".

Out of the mouths of old folks...

Older and Better.

A friend sent me this today.  I've been saying this for years...Why would I lie about my age?  If I didn't want to live 53 years, God could have taken me out 20 years ago, right?  That's why I Never Lie About My Age.  I can't wait to be 73, 93, 113...well that may be taking it a bit far.  Based on my current energy-sapped existence, I think I'll be super tired by then.

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I finally got some fashion pictures taken today.  A friend invited me to be featured in her blog.  I'll be sure to post a link on this blog when it comes out.  I'm so excited!  I'm showing off some of my MAH-VE-LOUS thrift store finds.

How do you feel about fur?  Personally, I have never worn it, but I did find a beautiful mink stole for $15 at an estate sale a couple of years ago.  I threw it over a casual outfit today, and I really like it.  I don't want to get doused with anything yucky.  Maybe I should pin a sign to it that says "This is Vintage!  The animal that contributed to this died a l-o-n-g time ago!  Besides which I bought it at a thrift store.  I'm helping to save the environment!"

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I just heard that people who eat a lot of sugar have a higher incidence of Alzheimer's.  Not good news for me and my cookie habit, but this could seriously cut into my fun.  I'm definitely getting back on the health bandwagon because I don't think these cookies are quite that good.  Besides, I need to stay sharp to keep bringing you the latest in thrift store fashion, vintage, and my warped sense of humor.  I wouldn't do that to you.  Growing old IS a privilege and I want to be deserving.  It can also be a burden if you're bogged down in health issues.  Time to start turning back that clock.

Take A Deep Breath...

I attended a health fair today, and if socializing and laughing are good for your health, then I did my body good today.  I talked to a lot of nurses, therapists, nutritionists and other health practitioners.  My favorite connection was with a Cranial-Sacral therapist.  What, you say?  Yep, that's what I said.  If you feel like reading, here's Wikipedia's take:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Craniosacral_therapy

After explaining the basic idea of manipulating the spinal fluid, I decided that I was game for a mini-session.  I have to say that it was very relaxing, possibly for the simple reason that I laid still for 15 minutes, while listening to ocean sounds.  I think any time I can make myself do that, I'm in for a relaxed outcome.  I have a purse full of fliers and handouts, a tangerine, a baggie full of vegan brownie bites and some decidedly unhealthy Smarties.  It seemed out of place, but plenty of vendors were giving out candy--a sure-fire way to get people over to your table--at a health fair.  Go figure.

My poor daughter was nearly attacked by a woman who was crazy mad about Affordable Health Care.  Mad, as in angry.  A little background:  She works for a healthcare organization as an ACA educator.  She's told me about the "characters" she encounters, but this one was over the top.  As soon as she said the word "Obamacare" the woman started screaming about how her premiums had gone up by $10,000/yr.  She was completely closed to any debate, explanation or attempt to discuss.  She said that her husband was a physician and she was "not a fan".  Oh----kay.  She also seemed very upset that, according to her, parents now HAVE to provide dental insurance for their children.  That's not the worst thing I've heard, and I was puzzled as to her quickness to attack.  Great customer service lesson for my daughter though.  She smiled and nodded as the woman's teenage daughter ushered her away.  She was really, really upset.  I don't know, but it seems that one might expect to hear about insurance at a health fair, and right now, in this country, insurance and Affordable Care are terms which are inextricably linked.  She really needed to breathe.  It did occur to me to ask her who did that botched job of plastic surgery on her face, but I remembered that my daughter was working and I'd better keep that comment to myself.  No joke, she was well on her way to this:

http://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=7211692700966702251#editor/target=post;postID=8754277118010379421;onPublishedMenu=posts;onClosedMenu=posts;postNum=122;src=postname

All that anger wasn't helping.  A smile would have sent her much further in the direction of pretty than those overstuffed, cement cheeks.

So after Botox Barbie stomped away, I got back to the sharing of information, eating oranges, drinking hot cider and getting my spinal fluid flowing.  That lady was messing up my NewAgey vibe, and walking back out into the bitter cold messed it up completely. I can't say often enough how not ready I am for it to be this cold.  On the up side, we are in for a heat wave this weekend...50 degrees!  After temps in the 20's for the past few days, it's going to feel like a vacation.  I'll send you a postcard!

Don't let the sunshine and blue skies fool you.  It's 25 degrees out here!

Perfect Day.

I haven't had a good camera outing in quite a while, so I was really happy to see the sun out today.  Yes, it was freezing (as in 24 degrees), but it was a pretty day.  Unless you are here to experience it, you'd think this was just another lazy day at the beach, but it was far from it.  It was a jump out, take a few pictures, run back to the car kind of a day.  I saw quite a few die-hard runners out there, and was a little shocked to see some kind of sailboat race on Lake Michigan.  Seriously.

 I got some great, great shots today.  I braved the bitter cold for these.  The boaters, runners and seagulls didn't seem to mind but  I was suffering...it took me three times in and out of the car to get them all.  Totally worth it!  I also made the obligatory thrift store stop.  I went to a new place called Green Element Resale.  This store was packed with a little of everything.  I didn't spend a lot of time there because I was illegally parked, but I will definitely go back.  Why did I do that?  Because we have these parking boxes here and the nearest one was around the corner, and it was COLD.  So I parked in front and kept one eye on the curb.

Beaded flower arrangement.  I absolutely LOVE it.  I tried to stand it on the dash, but it's too big.  Working on that.  It's very "bendy".  Fun!

Chief Yahoo electric tonic bottle.  Not sure if this is a reproduction.  It has a pontil mark.  Need to do some research!

Vintage Mainstreet down coat.  I love this coat, but it's too small.  I bought it anyway.  It's warm, not bulky, super lightweight and stylish.  I am SO MAD that I can't wear it.  It's the perfect layer for a hot-flashing girl like me!

 I took these pictures in the car.  I couldn't wait.  This is all I bought today, but I am loving these  unique items and I can't wait to use them. (Except for that darn coat.)  

I've been thrifting more than usual, and have a lot of catching up to do, as far as pictures and posting are concerned.  Here are a few of my recent finds:

Woven Born Boots.  I know, they're amazing.

I found this Pendleton suit last week.  It is in PERFECT condition.  Some lucky size 4 lady is going to be struttin' in style!  Pay no attention to the leash on the doorknob.  Remember:  this is not my house!

Talbots dress, found at the Free Store.  Yes!  My niece says it's ugly.  Is that a challenge?

Nature pics and thrift store finds.  I'm so predictable. 

Oh Happy Day!

I never thought it would happen, but it did.  I went into my storage unit (1 of 3) and found a set of glasses that I sold and couldn't find.  I really should have shut my Etsy store down when I moved, but I had a system.  The items that were for sale were supposed to come here, to my Mom's house, with me.  I sold this really awesome set of tumblers and then had to get busy figuring out where they were.  I was close--I knew which unit they should be in, but just my luck, they must have been one of the first things to go in there because it was in the very last box of the 30 or so that I opened.  NEVER disappoint a customer!  My lower back is letting me know not to pull that one again. 

Saturday means that I don't have to get up until eight, about two hours later than usual.  This means that I will stay up two hours later than usual.  So I'll go to bed at about 3am.  I'm a total night owl, especially now.  I sleep in a quiet environment.  Around here, there's a television on 24 hours a day.  I have been fed a steady late-night diet of Alfred Hitchcock, Night Gallery and the Twilight Zone.  The combination of creepy, phony and funny is intriguing.  The retro decor alone makes it worth watching.  

I found pink suede pants today!  HOT pink!  Suede!  And they fit ME!  That never happens.  Like never.  

The temperatures are freezing and heading down from there.  Single digits here in the Chi by Monday.  Two more years and I am so out of here!  As much as I can't stand the heat, single digits is just ridiculous.  Last Thanksgiving it was in the 60's.  It is virtually impossible to plan anything in this climate. Nope you can't plan for anything.  You have to plan for everything.  Still, I found those glasses (that had me really worried) so it's a good day.  

Willpower...

  

I have none.  And that's all I have to say about that.

Not really--I do have more to say.  I finally gave up on waiting until after Thanksgiving to do Christmas and let the kids turn on the Christmas radio station.  I have already heard Springsteen's version of "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" about six times.  Five weeks to go.  Oh boy...I don't get it.  Nearly every singer has done at least one Christmas album.  That means at least 10 songs.  Ten songs times thousands of singers times about seventy years.  I'm too lazy to do the math, but this has to yield hundreds of thousands of versions of songs.  So why do I keep hearing the same ten?  At this point, it's a tradition to listen to our local "Lite" station playing those same ten songs all day, then listen to "Delilah" at night, playing requests, which just happen to be those same ten songs.  How exactly does this work?

When we all get completely frustrated with hearing George Michael breathily puff out the words to "Last Christmas" we switch to CD's, but after a few days, even those 10 or 15 CD's get a little old too.  Except for James Taylor.  NEVER gets old.  But anyway, my point is that I need more (Christmas) music in my life. Living the far-less-than-frilly life means I have no satellite radio and no Ipod dock.  What's a girl to do?  Well, I think I have a solution.  I made an impulse buy of a tiny but powerful speaker about a year ago, a deeply discounted Ebay Daily Deal.  I'm not sure if there's a car charger, but  I'm sure there's a way to get it to work in the car.  I'm thinking that I can hook up either a phone, Ipod, laptop or some device to it and get a break from Amy Grant's rendition of "Grownup Christmas List", "The Most Wonderful Time of the Year", or Amy Grant's rendition of anything.  Totally not a fan.
I also caved and started watching Christmas movies on the Hallmark Channel.  Add that to my list of "must see t.v." as long as I'm at my Mom's.  I have to admit that they're pretty cute.  Schmaltzy, but cute.
So the season has officially begun.  This is going to be a very non-traditional Christmas for me, without my own home to decorate.  But it still holds promise, and it will still be great.
 I'm with family, so I really am home.

Thrifting Hazards...from an Expert

                                                   
I stopped by Restoration Ministries today, since I had to pass by there anyway.  I was gleeful when I discovered that it has half-off day.  As I tore through a rack of shirts, I felt an all-too-familiar sharp pain in my index finger.  I had done it again--in my haste to get to that RL floral blouse before the old lady approaching from the other end reached it, I put a staple through  my finger.  All the way through.  I stayed calm because I needed a steady hand to unthread the tiny metal rod from my hand.  So that's Hazard #1:  some stores still use handwritten tags and staples.  They tend to have lower prices.  You decide if it's worth it.  And no, the little old lady did not help me.  In fact, I think I heard a snicker.  

Hazard #2 is only relevant if you have severe allergies or asthma, like me.  I take a mask, gloves and inhaler into some estate sales because I know I may be digging through a basement or attic.  For unplanned trips, like today, I may not have the necessary equipment. (What I really needed was a couple of thimbles.)  On Saturday I went to a sale giveaway at the "Free Store" which pops up in a different part of the city 2-3 times each year.  You can't be a snob of any sort if you're going here because everyone is equal, everyone is welcome, and everyone comes.  It was fun, but it took me two days to recover from the airborne I Don't Know What in there.  My fault for not being prepared.  Note to self:  Take allergy meds, bring the emergency kit and try not to breathe next time.  Even if you take precautions, take off everything when you get home and put it in the washer.  Take a shower and wash your hair.  No kidding, folks.  You have no way to knowing what kind of pet hair, dander or other allergens are sticking to you just from being present.  I rarely wear a coat to a sale.  I dress in layers, with everything being washable.  I try to eliminate the need for a coat because I don't want a cleaning bill after I just got free stuff.  Just sayin'. 

Speaking of cleaning--I wash pretty much everything.  I do have a few small neighborhood stores that I know launder or dry clean everything.  Other than that, I put even "dry clean only" items into the washer.  Not all, but a lot of them.  Some items are just tagged that way because they need to be handled gently (like beaded or sequinned items.)  A gentle wash in the sink, a gentle squeeze and a flat dry on a few towels has yielded me excellent results.  I also put items like pillows in a hot dryer to kill dust mites, and any other mites that might be in it.  Might/Mite/Schmight.  If needed, I'll give it a surface wipe with a clean, slightly soapy towel.  I'll give a vigorous rub to any stains, but I typically stay away from any items with stains anyway.  I have to really want it, know what it's worth, and be confident that the stain is superficial.  Items that look and smell clean still get the hot dryer treatment.  Tip:  Spray the inside of the dryer with Lysol, pop in a fabric softener sheet, and tumble for 5-10 minutes, depending on the fabric.  I got this idea many years ago and it is definitely a keeper.  I feel so much better about those items that I'm too cheap to dry clean!  This makes me feel like I've gone the extra mile to clean and sanitize someone else's clothes that I know I'll be rocking tomorrow. 

Hazard #3:  Buying too much.  I've been on a bender for the past week.  I have too much stuff.  I have almost everything I own in storage right now, and I'm accumulating more.  It's hard to resist a $300 Magaschoni suit, tweed with leather trim, new with tags, 1/2 off at Unique.  Hard I say.  I bought it. Even my daughter says that she has too many clothes--weird kid, I know--but she LOVED her $15 Magaschoni suit. Be still my heart!   

I stayed away from housewares, furniture and home decor--I cannot justify putting any more stuff in storage.  Clothes are different.  I mean, I have to get dressed!  

This is just pure genius...